


Star Wars: The Lymphatic System Awakens

by Pandora_Spocks



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi - Fandom, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, The Last Jedi
Genre: A sensual comedy, Comedy, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Hippies, Hot stone massage, Inappropriate Use of the Force, It's good to be Rey, Massage, Minor Original Character(s), New Age, Occasional fart, Rey gets a massage from Kylo, Reylo - Freeform, Satire, Somewhat instructional, delusions of grandeur
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-12
Updated: 2017-10-12
Packaged: 2018-11-04 08:02:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10986822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pandora_Spocks/pseuds/Pandora_Spocks
Summary: In a game-changing screw-up, Kylo Ren is mistakenly sent away to massage school to study at Miss Fluka Highknocker's Yeti Academy, instead of Master Luke Skywalker's Jedi Academy, and begins a verydifferentkind of apprenticeship.Rey gets her first massage...





	1. The Switch

Han and Leia had _meant_ well.

When their teenage son, Ben, started showing signs of aggression, dressing like a Goth before their eyes, asking about Darth Vader every night, and perhaps most damningly, joy riding in the Millennium Falcon one too many times and crashing it into an asteroid, they decided it was time to send their son to his Uncle Luke to be trained as a Jedi.

Han was too busy (as usual, Ben scoffed) with repairing the Falcon to take him to the Academy himself, and Leia was being called into service in the Resistance and didn't have the time either, so Ben was sent by an Uber spacecraft to get him to Luke's Jedi Academy.

Unfortunately, the pilot was hard of hearing and thought he was taking the lad to the _Yeti Academy_ on Endor, a moon populated by both Ewoks and Wookies. The old Rebellion camp had been turned into a New Age school for massage and meditation. It was led by a peace-loving hippie with long blonde hair named Fluka Highknockers, which to the deaf pilot sounded like "Luke Skywalker," so in retrospect the mistake was understandable.

Ben was infuriated, but as he was turning 18 and wanted desperately to be out of the reach of both his parents and his officious uncle, he decided a stay on Endor wouldn't be as bad as having to listen to his uncle repeat that garbage about his grandfather, Darth Vader, turning on his Master and destroying him, all to save his son.

_It was so sickly sweet and reeked of drama._

It made Ben want to punch a wall. Why couldn't his Uncle Luke have gone for the power himself? What did Vader see in that whiny boy, Luke, who threw such a fit when Vader revealed to him his awesome parentage? It made no damn sense to him.

Ten years after this little detour, Ben wasn't so sure it had been a good call not to inform his parents of his whereabouts. The thing about Fluka was that she insisted that inner peace meant no communication devices or distractions. Or lightsabers. There wasn't a Hologram, droid, or communication device that he could find on the entire planet.

However, the teachings of Miss Fluka Highknockers were not without benefit and pleasure. She was a precise and exacting instructor and insisted he both learn to give as well as receive the Art of Touch and Pleasure.

Thus, Ben learned with the help of Fluka what Swedish Massage, Polarity, and Reiki could do for the body. He preferred the days when she let him practice on her smooth skin rather than the days that he had to maneuver around the hair of a Wookie, however.

Most illuminating had been the day when Fluka worked on him herself and awakened a new power source within him at his core, as well as an appreciation for her draping skills at his midsection. With this knowledge literally at his fingertips, Ben knew every woman in the Galaxy would want him. Secondary to correcting his grandfather's mistake for not opting for absolute power, this seemed a satisfying goal to attain. Fluka had frowned upon hearing this and warned him to use his powers of touch for Light only, never seduction.

Ben nodded solemnly while having no intention of honoring such a promise.

Then came the day that he had been waiting for. Fluka decided they needed to go "help the poor souls on Jakku who were in such poverty and need." At _last_ , he could use his Force ability and steal a ship (never Fluka's - it would be bad karma to steal from the woman who had taught him so much about women and what they wanted) and get on with his quest to fulfill Darth Vader's rise to power. 

Arriving on Jakku, Ben was disgusted to find a giant sandbox filled with lowlifes, scavengers, and a junkyard of old Imperial ships, although he had some curiosity about the latter.

Fluka, who definitely thought her younger male apprentice was a handsome specimen and enjoyed their arrangement, had decided her karmic duty was to match him with a woman closer to his age, perhaps someone lonely and less fortunate, and let this Force-sensitive young man use those strong and sensitive hands work their magic on someone truly deserving of it.

 Fluka had insisted he grow his hair long (although he did not wear it halfway down his back as she did). She wasn't able to get him to give up his preference for black clothing, but she felt this was probably practical given that the oils and lotions could stain lighter fabrics. Armed with massage tables and equipment, they set up their tents for massages on the unfortunates of Jakku.

*****

Rey ached with soreness from scavenging. She was in the middle of bargaining with the hateful Unkar Plutt when an older woman approached her and asked if she might offer her assistance. Rey stared at the blonde-haired woman with a crown of flowers around her free-flowing hair and moonstone necklace, wearing a floaty but easy to move about in tunic and pants, trailed at a distance by a tall cloaked man in black. Weary of bartering with Plutt, she nodded and followed the woman and her companion to the tents.

"I sense you have had a hard life, young lady," Fluka said to Rey as Ben listened. "You have an aura of Light about you, though, although I can tell you have had much pain. My apprentice studied the art of healing touch at my Yeti Academy and is the most gifted student I have ever had. Would you allow me the honor of letting him apply his healing touch to you? I wish no payment, only to ease your burden."

Rey looked at her as though she was the strangest woman she'd ever met, but she appeared sincere, although a bit spacey. She thanked Fluka and agreed, hoping this mysterious apprentice could do something for her aching joints and neck.

Fluka led her to the inside of the tent. Inside was the pleasant smell of incense. A simple table was in the middle of the tent with soft homespun sheets covering it. The lighting was dim, as the tent canvas blacked out even the hot Jakku sun. The temperature was surprisingly cool. A single candle was lit in the corner of the room, and in the corner, a small Ewok played a soothing tune on a lute.

"So what do I do?" Rey asked Fluka, having never seen such a room in her life.

"Relax, child, and take off your garments," said Fluka, helping Rey shed her arm sleeves. "I think you can manage the rest. When I leave, you will lie flat and supine on the table and pull the cover up to your neck, with your eyes looking up at the top of the tent. Inhale deeply and focus on your breathing."

Rey disrobed, thinking gratefully she would be covered by the sheet so her nakedness would not be on display. Fluka appeared again, folding Rey's clothes and putting them out of the way as she slipped a warm stone under the curve of Rey's neck. 

"Too hot?" she asked.

Rey's neck muscles unfurled at the heat of the stone. Surprisingly, even on the desert of Jakku, the heat applied directly to her neck muscles in this way felt fantastic! 

"It's perfect, Miss Highknockers," Rey replied.

"Just call me Fluka," her benefactress smiled, applying a cool compress to Rey's eyes, blocking out the light even further. Outside the tent, Ben had been pressing his ear to the fabric and listening in on every word.

Rey started to drift off in her comfortable surroundings. She heard someone enter the tent again, and this time felt an arm slip beneath the sheet to raise her legs into a knee bend. Some sort of circular cushion was inserted so that her knees were resting comfortably. Then her feet felt the sensation of a hot towel being wrapped around her ankles, soothing her aching feet. Without sight, she was not able to tell who was in the tent with her. She sensed as the presence approached the head of the table that it was _not_ Fluka, and her nose inhaled a slightly musky, pleasant masculine odor.

Inhaling deeply, Rey felt two strong, large hands touch ever so lightly on both sides of her face. Strong thumbs and hands cradled her face, staying still for a minute, letting the energy of his body connect with hers. Rey felt her breathing deepen as the energy field around the two individuals connected.

The hands shifted, and she felt one lie across her forehead as the other slipped under her neck, removing the cooling stone and cupping her neck while his other hand stayed across her palm. He remained that way, and Rey was amazed that just this simple position sent pulsing waves of energy through her body. She felt light...as if he were drawing the soreness and hurts of her body into himself.

*****

Ben looked with amazement upon the beauty of the girl on the table. THIS was what he had been waiting for... ~~a gorgeous woman to ravish~~  to do good for an unfortunate soul...who just happened to have the body of a goddess, which wasn't his fault, he mused. He had washed and rubbed his hands, warming them with a light massage lotion that smelled of arnica and chamomile.

He stared at her bound hair and immediately decided to do something about that. Rey made a sound of protest as he plucked the first hair tie from her bun and gently unfurled and pulled her hair free, and felt a warm fingertip touch her lips, indicating for her to be quiet. Rey relaxed, listening to the soothing sounds of the lute...and almost felt she heard the sound of the waves in the ocean she had imagined so often. He continued until her hair was loose and fanned on the table.

Ben smiled. He saw it...he saw the island...

***** 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***This is just some late night drivel for a one-shot I thought I'd do on massage since massage therapy is something I'm actually certified in (although I must point out I have never worked on a Wookie). 
> 
> I needed something light instead of working on my other story, so this is just a bit of fun writing for me and hopefully fun reading for you!


	2. Destiny unfolds...

Rey could not remember ever feeling more relaxed and yet as attuned to her body than she was now. His strong fingers were like magic as they made circular motions along her jawline and facial muscles. Her skin prickled when he moved to her ears and began to make slow circles around them. She almost let out a startled sound when he began to tug gently on her earlobes and then ran his thumb repeatedly along the inside shell of her ear. It was amazing how sensitive ears were...

"Every tiny little spot in your ear corresponds to another part of your body; that's why they are so sensitive," he said as if he had read her mind. "Like when I pinch here," he moved to a lower spot, "it stimulates your adrenal glands, but when I pinch here," he moved higher, "it corresponds to your pelvic cavity." Rey blushed beet red.

As if on cue, Fluka entered the tent again to check on her apprentice and guest. She stepped close to Ben and murmured something about not abusing acupressure points. Ben shrugged innocently. Fluka frowned and moved to Rey's feet. Ben gave her an exasperated look. He'd planned on hitting the key reflexology points in his client's feet to make her feel even more tingly than she already looked. Fluka could be a buzz kill at times. He extended his hand and tried to Force choke her, but nothing happened.

Fluka smirked back at him. "Wrong school, Ben. And we're out of belladonna, so don't think of using my potions for those dark thoughts of yours, either. Miss Rey, don't mind us, you just relax...good Maker, Ben, did you actually finally pull off that unconscious move you keep trying to do to me with your hand by the side of my forehead? She's out cold."

"Mmmmmm," murmured Rey, letting them know she was floating, but not asleep.

Ben fixed Fluka with his best, "Get lost" look, but Fluka continued to rub Rey's feet, twisting her hands back and forth along each, running her fingers through Rey's toes. Rey melted from the dual sensations of the foot rub and neck rub that Ben was now applying, moving his hands in a manner that triggered all her sensitive sore spots on her occipital ridge at the base of the skull and rubbed them away like magic.

Her head glided in his hands back and forth as he skillfully massaged her neck, turning her head to one side and running a thumb from the base of her ear along the side of her neck, performing lymphatic drainage. Rey made what sounded like a purr.

Fluka and Ben moved to either side of her and began to apply identical hand massages to the girl. Rey reveled in the sensory experience of one hand strong and purposeful, the other soft and strong but feminine. She felt their fingers move as if in unison as they stroked upward toward her heart from the inside of her wrist to her elbow and then massaged her biceps, triceps, and forearms.

Ben eyed Rey's abdomen, still covered by the sheet. Raising his eyebrows in question at Fluka, she held up a finger while she reached for a smaller linen rag. Skillfully she moved the rag over Rey's chest area and then slid the soft sheet down so that her abdomen was revealed, but her breasts were not. Ben rolled his eyes. Was he not going to have ANY fun? Fluka folded her arms. Apparently not while she was present, Ben decided.

With resignation, he felt for his client's ileocecal valve, pressed it, and then began to trace her colon. Rey's tummy gurgled as her digestive system activated. Ben admired the firm abdomen and small waist she had. Rey let out a loud fart, and Ben decided her abdomen had had enough of his ministrations.

A voice from the front of the tent drew Fluka's attention, and she stopped her supervision of Ben to check on the disruption. It was a rather handsome Resistance pilot who looked Fluka up and down and introduced himself as Poe, asking if he could prevail upon her for her services. Fluka looked like she'd just seen an oasis of cool water in the desert heat and was about to dive in for a long swim. Ben waited until she left before smirking. Alone at last...

Trailing a finger along the cloth covering Rey's leg until he reached her feet, he carefully folded back the linen draping. He frowned slightly. Apparently, pedicures and razors weren't made much use of on Jakku. Nevertheless, aside from a few corns, calluses, an unexpectedly odd bunion, and soft leg hair, her legs were shapely and well muscled.

Applying more lotion, he moved up her calves, kneading them expertly and drawing soft sighs from her. Then he moved upward along her thighs, kneading them, and running his thumbs expertly down her iliotibial band, always sore from the amount of walking she did. Rey gasped as she felt his fingers brush the edge of her groin. Later, Ben promised himself, later. His client looked so peaceful and relaxed.

He cleared his throat. "Miss...would you please turn over so I can do you? Um, so I can do your back, please." He was surprised when the blanket gently lifted by itself and seemed to hover over his client, and underneath the sheet, she levitated off the table, turned over, and gently was lowered back onto her stomach in the prone position as the comfortable sheet settled over her.

Ben was speechless. Somehow this girl in his presence had awakened the Force within him! Finally, he had exhibited power! His eyes grew bright with dreams of greater glory as he pictured Darth Vader's mask sitting in the ashes of his enemies! He thought he heard a muffled giggle and returned his attention to the girl.

Clearing his throat, he approached the head of the table and made sure the face cradle was locked into place. Somehow it seemed to have assembled itself there and Rey was already settled into position. Ben smiled and flexed his biceps. No training needed...with this girl around him, he was finally gaining control of the Force!

Moving the sheet sideways so that it covered her left buttock, he applied massage cream to his hands and used his strong hands to massage up her leg and into her glutes. He felt himself grow excited as he kneaded her spongy, firm buttocks. He heard her groan in appreciation.

Eagerly, he slid the sheet to her right and repeated the motions up the other leg, using his signature move of "waving" the heel of his hand from the base of her ankle up past her calf, then her hamstring, and finally her right glute repeatedly, mindful of doing the stroke so that circulation flowed toward the heart.

With a low, guttural sound in his throat, he jerked the sheet downward, revealing her perfect back. His large hands moved eagerly up her back, his hands tapping her skin expertly to bring the blood to the surface. Hm, he could probably accomplish this with spanking as well, he thought idly and then swore he heard another muffled giggle from the girl.

Rey groaned in appreciation as he applied hot stones slowly over her oiled back to increase the expansion of her stiff muscles, followed quickly by his strong fingers digging deep behind her shoulder blades and massaging away the knots and tension. After he finished, he pulled the sheet over her perfect body and did light strokes of effleurage lightly running from her head to her toes, brushing off any negative energy in her polarity field.

He cleared his throat, indicating the massage had concluded, although he could think of several ways he would have preferred to finish it. Almost after the thought was done forming in his head, the sheet and his client floated up off the table, light as air, and she rotated until she was once again face up on the table. As she settled back into place, her hazel eyes opened and met his stare, and a wide smile formed on her face as the bottom of the sheet lifted by itself.

Ben couldn't believe he had levitated his client and the sheet, and that furthermore, she seemed to be inviting, even expecting his attention. Eagerly he put his head underneath the sheet, and a few moments later his client was shrieking in ecstasy.

********

Fluka returned to check on her pupil's progress, feeling a bit lightheaded herself. She felt the strong arms of the pilot spin her around and dip her for one more passionate kiss. Mmm. She smiled at him and murmured, "Later." She then strode into the tent where she found her young apprentice looking a bit unsatisfied but utterly exhausted. There was a huge smile on the client's face.

"Were you pleased with his work?" Fluka asked the client quizzically.

"Oh yes, he performed very well indeed," Rey purred. "He'll do quite nicely for me. And you? Did you enjoy the pilot I sent you?"

The older woman gave a satisfied smile. "The planets are finally in perfect alignment for peace and fulfillment, as I told you on our last tarot reading."

Ben stared at the two, perplexed. They were speaking as if they knew each other. His erection started to lessen. Rey extended her hand, while covering her body with the sheet, and Fluka came and guided her off the table. Hand in hand, they looked lovingly at Ben, whose heart skipped a beat. Was this particular fantasy about two women about to come true, along with his new Force abilities bringing him the power to rule the galaxy?

Fluka and Rey looked at each other as though they had read his thoughts and then burst out laughing!

"Oh yes, he will do nicely indeed," Rey said, walking toward him. Ben tried to move but found himself fixed in place by some kind of invisible hold. Rey continued to advance and lovingly ran a hand through his silken mane and down his firm chest, eyeing the rest of him with approval.

Ben looked as much as his neck would allow him from one woman to the other. _What was going on?_

Fluka arranged the floral crown that had slipped back onto her head and finally spoke.

"My dear apprentice, your training is finally complete. You will be the perfect match and companion for this lovely young lady. I daresay you will enjoy your duties and life from here on out, although your destiny will not be quite what you wished it to be. You see, I saw in your aura such darkness when you first came to my academy. I knew immediately you had been intended for Luke Skywalker's Jedi Academy, but it seemed foolish to let your fate play out as tragically as it was going to - no, you don't want to know," she shook her head at him sorrowfully.

Fluka continued, "But now, I have met the perfect person to balance this darkness within you. I met Rey many moons ago when I came to Jakku to help the homeless while you were back working on your technique with the Wookies. This young woman was coming into her own Goddess powers, and I recognized instantly the Awakening within her. After some discussion, we arrived at an arrangement."

Ben struggled, still held in the Force grip. "What?!"

Rey smiled and took control of the conversation and the willful apprentice. "I'm strong with the Force, Ben Solo. I've met with your parents and your uncle, and we are all in agreement. You are going to stay here with me and Fluka - well, Fluka and Poe will be in an adjacent tent. You're going to enjoy learning to scavenge. It will keep that muscular physique of yours quite strong."

"But I...I am strong with the Force as well!" Ben gasped.

Rey laughed. "You might have been if you had listened to your parents and gone to Luke's Jedi Academy instead of being so willful and power hungry. Fluka was right in not wanting such a perfectly gorgeous specimen of a man to go to waste chasing...what was it? 'Absolute power while wearing a mask set in the ashes of your enemies.' Oh, Fluka, I'm sorry, I've got the giggles again!!" Rey collapsed into a fit of laughter.

Fluka smiled serenely. "Quite all right, my dear. Crisis averted, and I think he'll like what you have planned for him much better."

Ben's brows knit together ferociously. "What does this mean?"

Rey walked toward him and stroked his face as he stayed frozen in place. "It means, dear Ben, _you need a teacher."_

*****

Five years hence, Fluka and Poe enjoyed one last fly-by before the skilled Resistance pilot parked his X-wing on the sands of Jakku. A huge burst of noise beside them confirmed the Millennium Falcon had landed as well. The ramp lowered and Han Solo and his wife, Leia, descended from the ramp followed by Luke Skywalker. They hugged Fluka and Poe and walked toward the small tin shelter that was now of much sturdier build, though still simple. A radiant Rey came out and embraced her in-laws. Ben appeared sullen, but he managed a hug for his parents and uncle.

A large bonfire was lit that evening, and Rey snuggled up closer to Ben as they sipped the offerings of wine and delicacies they tasted so rarely on Jakku which Leia had brought them. Han bounced his grandson on his knee, then sniffed him, made a face, and handed him over to Ben, who went to change his diaper.

A time of great danger had been averted thanks to Fluka and Rey's intervention. Somewhere in the distance, the Ewoks that had come for the family celebration played the (original) score that Luke, Leia, and Han remembered after the Battle of Endor, and Peace and Balance reigned once again in the Force.


	3. "Happy Endings"

**_Epilogue for the next five years..._ **

 

Ben became a model husband because Rey obviously was able to keep him in line. Ben even grew to like it!

Leia's forces defeated Snoke and Hux quite easily with her son's emo-angst channeled into pleasing Rey every night.

Luke's Jedi Academy is doing well.

Fluka still enjoys being courted by her suitors, Poe and Finn, and continues to read the stars for signs of the universe going off-kilter.

Ben perfected the art of Swedish massage, and sometimes even receives one back from Rey when he's been extra good!

 

~Pandora "Fluka" Spocks

However, with the introduction of The Last Jedi, Fluka's alteration of future events have an impact on the characters that Fluka's tarot cards failed to warn her about...

 

To be continued...


End file.
